Having a great marriage doesn’t happen by accident; it takes time and effort. You may say that your marriage comes first, but that doesn’t matter if you devote your time to something lower on your list.

Today, we’re sharing advice for prioritizing your spouse so that you can have a healthy and happy marriage.

1. Make A To-Do List

We all have to-do lists a mile long. We need to accept that the to-do list feels like its always growing. Then, we can prioritize those projects. 

The same goes for our marriage as well. Make a to-do list for your marriage. Ask yourself, “What matters most today in the time I have with my spouse?”

Start your marriage to-do list with one thing you can do for your marriage each day. Activities on your marriage to-do list could include going for a walk together, having a productive conversation, making a nice dinner, or praying together. Complete the item you want to get done the most and make your marriage and your spouse a priority during your day.

2. Say “No” Often

There are many good things in our lives to commit to, but we may not have time for all of them. Practicing the art of saying no is one of the best ways to make time for your relationship. 

Say no to the things that are robbing you of time with your spouse. You may need to say no to some of the things you love. Make a list of time-consuming activities like Facebook, ESPN, Netflix, working late, an unhealthy habit, or other distractions that keep you from intimacy. 

When you start saying yes to the best things in life, like your spouse, it gets easier to say no to the less-important things.

3. Plan Time To Get Away

Find the time at least once a year to get away, just you and your spouse. It doesn’t have to break the bank, but get creative and make it fun. 

 At Longview Retreat, we believe that getting away from daily demands allows couples to rejuvenate, reconnect, and restore their relationship and connect with God on a deeper level.

Your time away could be a visit to a bucket list location, a marriage retreat, or a visit to the spot where you got married. Book the hotel and plane tickets, mark it on your calendar and commit to it and your spouse.

4. Create Buffers For The Unexpected

When you are booked with activities, there’s no time for the unexpected. And if there’s one thing we can always expect, it’s the unexpected. Whether it’s traffic, a car problem, a miscalculation of time, or a miscommunication, there are many unexpected moments that steal our time.

Create a buffer of extra time in your schedule to prevent feeling frazzled. If you need to get up by 7:00, then get up at 6:30. If you need the babysitter to arrive by 5:30, schedule them 15 minutes earlier. These small buffers in your schedule will help reduce the mayhem and make more time for your marriage.

5. Set Goals As A Couple

Set goals as a couple for your marriage relationship, your family, your kids, and each of you individually.  When we have clearly defined goals that WE have agreed to and come up with, it makes it so easy to filter the crazy demands for our time that always seem to come up.  If the new request will advance our goals we do it. If not, we pass on it.

When you spend time planning your life together, you have to prioritize each other and your marriage. Setting goals for your marriage gives you a better chance of having a happy and fulfilling marriage.

The key in your marriage is to make that relationship a top priority and making the time for your spouse. Saying something is a priority, and making it a priority are two very different things. Make your marriage a priority by carving out the time it deserves.