5 Goals to Focus on When Attending a Marriage Retreat

Couples attend marriage retreat weekend events for two reasons; a general maintenance tune up for a good marriage, or help and hope for a marriage in crisis.  A marriage is like most everything else in life–you have to take care of it. And the more you put into it the more you will get out of it. Here are some goals to focus on when you and your spouse attend a marriage retreat, so your relationship can be renewed and restored.


1. Learn Something New

During your time at the retreat, you have opportunities to learn something new, see something in a new way, or gain clarity on something cloudy or misunderstood. This can be as simple and reassuring as “Hey, we’re not the only couple having this kind of conflict,” to complex topics like “Sin in one form or another is destroying our relationship, and Jesus is the ONLY real way to overcome sin.”

bible study

2. Find Hope

The purpose of your married couples retreat is to emerge with hope that ultimately strengthens your bond for years to come. Make it a priority to discover hope. That hope can be for a better marriage, for hearing something that will make a difference in your life, or hope that you WILL change and not just talk about it again.

The ultimate hope developed during your retreat is the hope that Jesus IS who He says He is and that He can change us both to see life and live in a completely different way.

Most of us don’t know how to be married, but we see (or used to) many others doing it, so we think we should be able to, too. And we should, but quite often, we overlook one incredibly important detail.

We are living in a world at war. It’s a spiritual battle for our souls. If we don’t understand what is going on and how to protect ourselves and our marriage, we will lose precious ground that can cause damage that takes an act of God to restore.

couple on a picnic

3. Reconnect

You will gain even more from your marriage retreat if you are willing to unplug, spend quality time with your spouse, and enjoy events specifically designed to bolster your bond. Disconnect from this crazy, hectic world that sometimes feels like a meat grinder (and guess who the meat is), and reconnect with each other like in the beginning.

Neither of you signed up for marriage desiring or expecting it to be the whirlwind you are now living. Why are we SO busy? We have so many time-saving conveniences, yet we have no free time.

What’s behind all that? Do you think it could be our enemy from hell?

When you spend a weekend away with your spouse, use it to reconnect intentionally. Be alone with each other and talk about your relationship. If you need help, Longview Retreat’s marriage experts will help you through it. And if you don’t need one-on-one support, Longview offers a beautiful setting to ease your mind; to relax, to give you the space to make progress as a couple.

farm - longview

4. Develop Understanding and Empathy

Another goal to focus on is to find tools to understand each other. 

“Why does she want to talk about it so much?” “Why won’t he talk to me about this–where is he going?” 

Do women confront to connect or confront to control? Hmmm. Most women process life verbally, and most men like to think things through. Not always, but often. Regardless, when we expect our spouse to go through life and do life the way we do, we set ourselves up for conflict. A conflict that, in some instances, was designed by God. Come to Longview Retreat and hear what Emerson Eggerichs has to say about Tuesday night.

The strongest and most successful bonds are built on understanding, respect, and love. At your retreat, open up, be willing to listen, and healing will come naturally.

man falling asleep while wife talks

5. Rebuild a Foundation

For some couples, attending a marriage retreat is meant to provide relief from the crisis they’re experiencing in their relationship.

Some couples may have an elephant in their living room. This can happen if one spouse tries very hard to “be nice” and gets to the point of eruption– they’re ready to explode. Marriage is not what they expected, and they have no skills for untangling the mess they now call life. NOBODY wants this. But we very much want to be happily married so we put up with it until we can’t any longer.

In either case, we now have a full-blown crisis, and restoration will take huge doses of love, respect, forgiveness, and repentance. Which we now have so little of.

A marriage retreat is an opportunity to re-establish a loving and godly foundation that proves sturdy when conflicts, disagreements, and hardships arise.


Ultimately, your weekend marriage retreat is a time for you and your spouse to enhance your relationship and emerge feeling refreshed. What better place than at Longview Retreat?

Click here to learn more about our retreat options, and choose the package that will offer you quality time and relationship-building activities to restore your marriage.